March 8, 2021

What should I do if I catch my son watching pornography? – The province

What should I do if I catch my son watching pornography? - The province


The addiction to pornography It is increasing among the younger ones. He 95 percent of parents He acknowledges having discovered his children by accessing pornographic material through the Internet, according to a study by the BitDefender company carried out in five countries. The most alarming of all is that this information reveals that the average age at which children begin to search for this type of content is at eleven years.

Access to this type of inappropriate content by children is one of the main concerns of parents. Although curiosity about sex is normal, excessive consumption of pornography can lead to social skills deficits, self-esteem problems or that the minors have a distorted image of their bodies.

But how do I react if I catch my son watching pornography?

If we discover our son accessing pornographic material on the Web, the reaction we have at that moment can inspire the vision of sex that that child has in the future. Instead of getting upset or shouting at her, the psychologist Kristen Howerton It gives us clues about how to talk to minors about this topic.

Stay emotionally neutral: The embarrassment and the uncomfortable situation makes many parents lose their nerves at that moment. Howerton remembers that it is not necessary to talk to the child at that moment and that the best thing that parents can do is wait a bit until they calm down so they do not feel more ashamed.

Normalize the situation:Even if you do not like the child's behavior, you should show him that his sexual curiosity is not bad, only that it is preferable to express it in a different way. That way you will not feel so embarrassed to get excited seeing those images.

It is important to normalize the situation. Getty Images

Talk to the child about the lies of porn: Once the situation is normalized, it is important that the child is aware that pornography is a manufactured product that differs a lot from reality.

Treat the subject in a positive tone: The nerves of the moment can cause many parents to end up screaming or punishing their child. However, Kristen Howerton remembers how important it is to talk to the child in a positive tone, helping her see sex as healthy.

Explain the dangers of pornography: The addiction, the reification of women, or the distortion of one's own body are some of the problems that pornography can bring to a developing mind. In addition, this type of content sometimes reinforces attitudes that condone rape and sexual harassment.

Ask him if he has any questions: Let the child know that he can talk about what he has seen or ask any curiosity he has. In this way the parents will show that the topic is not scary and that they are willing to deal with them.

Make clear the limits from that moment: After normalizing the situation and reducing the embarrassment, we must re-establish limits. Howerton explains that now is the time to install parental controls on computers and other devices. The psychologist recalls that, although many children say they will not see pornography again, leaving the devices in the house uncontrolled does them a disservice.

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