We only get one word to define the new Spanish production of Netflix, ‘Crazy about her’ (+16 years old), by Dani de la Orden: wonderful. Is about a film that has made us cry, laugh, reflect … in short, we loved it. And we firmly believe that Seeing her with your teenage sons and daughters is a great plan that you should not miss. We explain why (no spoilers!).
1. The representation (and not stigmatization) of mental illness
The plot of this film takes place in a mental health center and some of the protagonists have Tourette syndrome, depression or bipolarity, among others. However, as we already know, the simple appearance of people with mental health problems is not always a positive thing, the approach with which it is treated is very important, and in ‘Crazy about her’ the representation that is done is wonderful. There is no room for ridicule, contempt or stigmatization of mental illness or the people who suffer from it: the approach seeks normalization. Something very necessary in a society that still treats people who suffer from some type of disorder differently, that tries to make their difficulties invisible instead of helping them make their lives a little more bearable.
2. Willing is not always power
This film It also breaks with the Mr. Wonderful messages that many times frustrate us more than help us. And is that wanting is not always power, trying is not always winning, and this is a very important message that we must convey to our sons and daughters. But beware! It is not about not encouraging them to try or promoting a pessimistic perspective, quite the opposite: it’s about fostering realistic optimism. To propose challenges, but being aware that we are all “us and our circumstances”, and that we also have to take into account our circumstances when proposing challenges, otherwise we will only generate frustration.
In addition, going to the specific case at hand, we cannot pretend that people who have an illness are cured by making them want and wishing for their recovery. It may seem too obvious to you, but a person with anxiety is not going to calm down by saying “calm down, you are very nervous”; a person with depression will not be happier to hear “smile a little more, that life is two days”; and so on a long list… With this type of comment we are not providing our help or support, but rather we are denying and making both the person and their condition invisible.
3. We don’t want blue princes
On the other hand, and how could it be otherwise, we have to talk about the conception of love that this film conveys. ‘Crazy about her’ breaks gender stereotypes and myths of romantic love to which we are so accustomed to love comedies and dramas. Carla, the main character, does not need a prince to save her, and that is very clear to us from the beginning of the film. Although Adrián, the protagonist, takes a little longer to realize it …
4. Love is acceptance
It is likely that you know someone close to you, or maybe even yourselves, who has a relationship in which you expect the other person to change. Sometimes minimal things, aspects that can be improved, and that’s great. But, many other times … we hope that this person changes completely to fit within the idea that we had made about the type of partner we wanted. We can also see this reflected in many movies and series. But, in reality, love is acceptance and admiration, and this should be very clear to our sons and daughters.
On the one hand, because they must learn to love others without trying to change their personality, but also the other way around: they should not change, or forget who they are, their essence, for anyone.
We can see this clearly reflected in ‘Crazy about her’, that’s why we like so much the conception of love that promotes. The question does not lie in waiting for the loved one to “heal” at some point and thus be able to be happy, but in getting to know each other more and more, accompany and take care of each other. That is true love.
5. The problem of society
In this movie we can also see that many times, the great impediments of people who have any of these mental problems are not given by their problem itself, but by society in which we live.
For example, one of the protagonists has Tourette syndrome, but that is not what takes her to the mental health center, but the depression that she has derived from the stones that the same society has put in the way.
Definitely, ‘Crazy about her’ is an ideal option to spend quality time with our teenagers, to ask them questions, to laugh, to learn together. We hope you enjoy it, family. And also that you take care of reminding your sons and daughters that, as the director of the center says at a certain point in the film, “the difficult thing about having a mental illness is that people want you to behave as if you don’t have it” .
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